Toasters

Bread + Heat --> Toast + Butter --> A delicious snack.
As it says on that rather long lurpack advert, a granary canvas for a million toppings, or something like that. Toast is yummy, but a pain to make because of the TOASTER *dramatic music*
This morning, I got up, I have no cereal left *cries* so I thought hmm what can I eat (since nothing is never an option). Toast I thought.
I am now in a bad mood because my bloody damn toaster is stupid and only seems to toast bread on one side. Which is pointless because then its not toast, its still bread...... Its all the toasters fault for being wrong, I even burnt my hand because I had to turn my "bread/toast" around so that the bloody machine could toast it on the other side!! As with all machines, why can't it just work!! Seriously, those German boffins who come up with every good idea for the world today better fix my toaster but recently, they haven't seem to have come up with many new inventions. CREDIT CRUNCH biting - I think not!! They have just become lazy bastards and use it as an excuse.
So a summary:
Does this article make sense?
No
Did I have a nice breakfast?
No
Has anyone come up with a way for me to have nice toast?
No

Seriously - GET IT SORTED